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Saturday, July 14, 2007
so with the onset of reality, there goes my short spree of 99% positiveness.
its so hard to see the silver lining when even ppl who have consistently performed way better than you are getting depressed. can i overcome all odds, and attain all 'C's for prelims? it remains to be seen, however, i guess it is time i took some pride and responsibility in my results instead of foolishly thinking i'll get phenomenal results with my slipshod attitude.
the obstacles that lay before me are even more now that i am trying to work hard. the battle is both internal and external and the only platform i'm winning on, is the deluded grey area in between that fuels my optimism. i don't see it diminishing anytime soon, but its likely that as the two battles get more intense, this 'in between' space will inadvertedly get compressed. my acknowledgement is thus, i must reach breaking point soon. or it'd mean i'm still slacking my ass off.
it is interesting though, to observe how my friends or 'friends' are coping with their successes and failures. this high-stress period is the time inherent character flaws start showing up. some need people like me around who do worse than them to boost their morale in face of their mediocrity. i take comfort in the fact i don't live the same narrow lives as them. i'm thankful, though, of being in a nice class, which means my contact with the above-mentioned is minimal, though not scarce as i'd wish it to be.
~~supposed to end the post alr but i went friendster serfing first instead lol~~
i got a little too carried away reading past testimonials in friendster from the back that i went over recent. it was really interesting to see what some of my friends wrote for me back then, esp with those of whom i'm still in close contact with. some of the guys and gals were still using twits then even! hahaha and imagining them talking in twits now.. hilarious. but then, there are some memories best left forgotten that still lingers in those archives.. oh well, the sudden shortlived heart ache was refreshing. lol it had been a while. who knows when i'd ever bother with the play that feeling again.
anw, although this post may sound a little bleak, my optimism levels are actually still quite on the high. mrs chang mentioned to me the sometimes over optimism can be bad and may just be another face of unrealism, but aiya, how perfect can life be? =))
current outlook: optimistic still.
+ graham + 2:21 AM
Saturday, July 7, 2007
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ok the bloody ian actually admitted to shitting during that time which probably explained the whiff of foul air that flew up my nose :S incidently yan tou who was next to his cubicle smelt nth while me being 3 cubicles away did. maybe there were more ppl hiding like us o.O
now here he is sticking out his tongue perhaps acting cute so we will think the smell of his shit was cute. haha. jkjk =p i was doing ice cream tongue thing with him and nicholas today too lol. that's because we're in tj and hence we're bored asses.
that's thu our treasurer and chin liang a.k.a. bobby, another poor soul living under the tyranny of our ruthless and merciless treasurer.
extorting class funds without batting an eyelid, she is always feared when she proceeds to the back row of us helpless guys. today, however, the chem h2 students witnessed an interesting sight during our practical lesson. thu was actually passing 20 odd dollars to bobby! it was a joyful moment caught on camera by the quick journalistic thinking of ian and graham. seeing the happiness on thu's face when passing the money, we see a different side of her full of charity and compassion, the true spirit of a leo. we finally accept that thu is on the side of good, only oppressed by the money grubbing authorities, so, she has been having to play the devil or face the wrath from above.
we know u fight a hard battle but take comfort in the knowledge that good always prevails over evil. may the force be with you xD
+ graham + 12:17 AM
Thursday, July 5, 2007
too many changes are taking place within this period but its anything but too fast.
such a feeling is something i've missed for such a long time, one that keeps me perked for the challenges that appear before me. i do enjoy such a positive outlook =) results ARE important for your future, don't get me wrong, but doing badly is not the end of the world. u may say i'm consoling myself for such poor results but i've long been over the need for that. i mean how much can another person say since results are of personal accomplishment and hard work?
now's the period everyone is being so fixated on their results.
in the end, it's your personality that will carry you through. what will your boss think if he or she knew you are such a complainer, comparer or even whiner??
~~~
left for school earlier than ever today and reached hai sing's bus stop at around 3 plus only to run into a sea of turqoise. esp since i've just been feeling nostalgic from my dinner with the guys at simpang the other day, it was overwhelming walking through a bus stop of over 50 hai sians!
then somehow, just greeting old friends and juniors there somehow put an extra bounce in my step. guess there's no hiding it then, i do miss hai sing =)
4e1 '05 - the characters
it was just the funky friends there i reminisced about at first. but thereafter on my way to downtown east, i ran into my junior, CI eugene sir! lol. he told me he was gonna take up the role of camp coordinator for this year's Area 8 Annual Training Camp(ATC) at ubin. yes that pretty much got me on reminiscing on the np life i had too and the CI post i had chosen to forsake. choosing not to be a CI probably wasn't the best decision i have ever made, giving up an enhancing experience just like that was supposed to have been done if one had something else in store. but now's not the time for regrets, cos i don't wanna break the positive outlook i'm subconsciously programming myself to feel right now =) be it a good thing or a bad thing, i like to see the good.
+ graham + 9:30 PM
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
now i ain't those kind who say their results suck but still pass.
my results sucked.
the results for my class has a high than average mean but a large variance too lol. can calculate by normal distribution! thanks to the super scholars and ultra slackers x)
i have this classmate who got 82/90 for maths that's like an A* in primary school. we were discussing about it and realised that unless he got 10/10 for class participation marks, it would pull his overall mark down! haha. that's just a sick thought.
stress management course was pretty useful for me today. particularly since i slept through the thing so i relaxed a fair bit =)
+ graham + 11:02 PM
Monday, July 2, 2007
here's the pic of the guys watching live porn as mentioned on kelvin's blog. think they sat there for like 10 over minutes just sitting and laughing lol. i watched for 1 min and got bored, not hardcore enough i guess =p hahaha. there was one point dolce (brown) was like humping joshi (white) and everyone was like high and laughing then the dogs suddenly stopped and just looked at them acting innocent. guess they aren't embarrassed during foreplay but coy when it comes down to business!
after beach soccer and vball my toenails kinda had a free pedicure session cos it became like really smooth and matt. cool! wish i could play it more often =)
thank you to everyone who contributed to the great food we had that day too! yum yum :D
ok after that audrey chai wei cheng was like kp-ing me that i jihong him/her -_- DON'T BE SO BHB PLEASE. girls must be more demure and don't kp so much alright ms chai?
SUNDAY
the next day was soccer with the hai sing guys. i couldn't help but feel super tired after 3 straight days of playing soccer but when the adrenaline was pumping during our 4-game winning streak against a few group of mats i hardly felt the fatigue and played through them all. we actually thought we would lose at first cos they were mats after all. ok but so we found out as with all mats who smoked their skills are there but their stamina isn't. so it was like a close fought 15-min-2-goal match. so the team with shang yong, wey zi, willie, gabriel, ee hern and me managing to fend off 3 teams of fresh legs was a pretty good accomplishment and a good soccer day =) then when wey zi and clifton who came late were playing basketball with some neighbourhood kids and shang and the rest were training their left legged kicks i actually took a nap on the bench. lol. hope i kick the habit of taking power naps once school reopens.. gotta keep up with all the revision i can get!
a levels ain't that far away anymore. think i'll be starting my tuition for maths and/or chem soon.. will have to see how it goes within these two weeks. the money that will have to be spent on it will be damn sayang..
MONDAY
anw today was a really great day watching transformers with clif and zi and thereafter havin kat and willie join us for dinner. reminiscing over dinner just made me miss the old times and i was struck by a wave of nostalgia on my way home on the bus. it set me thinking.. (to be continued)
btw.. megan fox really is hot!
i agree with u chicken and climbers! haha.
hope i don't get cruxified for putting such a suggestive photo on my blog, i got it off google images! i'm just shortening the process for the guys out there who thinks her role in transformers was hot too! xD
found out too that her birthday is 16th may 1986.. that's like 2 days after mine, a fellow taurean. out with those horns RAR :p
shang yong u lucky bastard to share your birthday with this babe. haha. hope you're doing well with your three fions/fionas hot boy!
+ graham + 9:40 PM